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This falls in the same category as thanking men profusely when they help you open a jar. Of course I'm grateful and I will thank you sincerely. But if you really need me to smile and bat my eyelashes for five minutes to make it worth your while, you are really not the type of guy I want to attract, and by the way, where are the rubber gloves I use when I am alone at home and need to open a damn jar?
If you help me move heavy appliances from one house to another, it is another story. Thanks guys! Want more ice cream? Have more ice cream. I don't buy this thing of competing so much with other men that men are shy of anything resembling additional competition from women. Listen: I also have to compete.
This somehow has not made me pathologically dread every male who happens to be more intelligent than I am. Stellamaris, I don't think that either Auntie S.
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It's just that they prefer not to seek out their intellectual superiors as mates. There could be a variety of reasons for this, including their wish to be the intellectual "lead" in a relationship; or the fear of feeling stupid in front of a woman and losing her respect; or simply, as Auntie S. It's not a matter of "pathological dread" of competition, so much as a weariness of constantly engaging in it.
Men have many innate advantages but are not invariably paid more and promoted faster than women in the 21st century. It's interesting about male egosor any ego. By the way, why do we still all use this Freudian concept?
But I digress. I grew up listening to my mother telling us how clever my father is and praising him all the time.
You would think I would have talked to my boyfriends that way. However, I don't think I did. My husband, on the other hand I think getting men to talk about things that interest them is an important social skill. I have been to many dinner parties in my time, and getting the taciturn guy next to me to talk is an interesting and traditional challenge.
Interest is infectious-unless his great passion is the TV series "Jackass. By the way, that is a totally fictional astrophysicist in my example, based on what I think I must sound like in Polish. As a matter of fact, all the Polish scientists I have met so far speak English really well. Never mind. Your novelistic gift was showing.
That English-mangling Polish astrophysicist is now an entirely real person in my mind.
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This is Edinburgh Housewife, a blog for Catholic women and other women of good will. It assumes that the average reader is an unmarried, childless Catholic woman over Commenters are asked to take that into consideration before commenting. Anonymous comments may be erased. I read this article knowing at once how it would end because the article was about a study showing that men don't like hanging out with women who beat them at IQ tests. Instead of advising women not to engage in IQ tests with men, which is relatively easy to do, it suggests men need to change.
Of course, these findings don't mean that all or even most men are threatened by smart women.
Oct 26, On Dating News from Huff Po I read this article knowing at once how it would end because the article was about a study showing that men don't like hanging out with women who beat them at IQ tests. Instead of advising women not to engage in IQ tests with men, which is relatively easy to do, it suggests men need to change. jankossencontemporary.com UK Daily Brief. Get the latest news and biggest stories sent straight to your inbox every weekday. Subscribe here. Successfully Subscribed! Realness delivered to your inbox. At jankossencontemporary.com, we report with empathy and put people at the heart of every story. Learn more here. Trump Impeachment Trial Features Bipartisan Laughs At Rudy Giuliani's Expense. Senators laughed at a clip of a former Trump adviser saying that hiring Giuliani was a way to "impeach oneself." 'From Heartbreak Comes Hope:' Koala Rescuers Share.
More research needs to be done until there are any practical implications. In the meantime, it's probably not a bad idea for threatened men to do a little soul-searching and think about why they might be intimidated by smart women.
So much for "born this way", eh?
When I was 25, I would have taken all this extremely seriously, especially the passive aggressive nagging at men to change. Guys have to compete with guys all the time. In Poland male Polish wedding guests march up to male foreign wedding guests and wordlessly invite them to drink vodka shots with them.
I saw incidents of this myself this month: it was very funny although, of course, not so funny for the foreign men. Having an intelligent conversation is not the same thing as competing. Trying to win an argument is, however, competing.
Fine for work. Not so fine for social life.
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At best, girls are a lot of fun to be around. They make you feel good about yourself. They don't try to cut you down to size or to get you to drink more than you can stand or to become obstacles in your career path.
Except when they do -which to many men feels like the woman are cheating. Men hate it when they feel women-not-on-their-side have power over them, and fair enough. I would feel scared if men-not-on-my-side had power over me. Come to think of it, I suffered unde women managers I really couldn't stand, and they were always way harder to deal with than any male employer I ever had.
If it is a FACT that men are turned off by women they KNOW-in some agreed upon, quantifiable way-are smarter than they are, then the really smart women will not stress to the men we meet that we might be smarter than they are. We don't have to "play dumb". We just don't get drawn into "who is the smartest? Work is a different story although even there I am sure one can be gracious.
Not everyone you meet needs to know that you went to a "Top 15" college, gag, barf.
We don't exaggerate how smart we are, and we don't nuke men with our intelligence unless we are trying to turn them off. I once nuked a drunken chap who was making ridiculous claims about Saint Thomas Aquinas.
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