Some forums can only be seen by registered members. Originally Posted by Prescotturner. Do you date friends within your own social circle? As in, the friends who you go out and watch a movie with or go to a theme park with. Personally, I wouldn't do it because it would be awkward if there is a rejection or break up because you belong to the same social circle. Originally Posted by burgler There's no one in my social circle that I'd ever want to date.
Social Circle vs. Cold Approach
You need to learn to be able to process information rapidly and respond quickly and appropriately. Even better though: the odds are good that your potential date already knows a little about you. She may have seen you at a the same parties as your friend or taking part in the same community.
She may have seen that the two of you share similar interests. Having seen you before - or having heard about you from her friend - means she will be more aware of your good qualities, which will carry more weight than if you try to show off or even brag a little.
Warm approaches will also make it easier to get a number, one where she is much more likely to respond, rather than to use her voice mail and caller ID to filter you out.
How to Escalate with Girls in Social Circle. Other people within the social circle will hear of your hook-up (or attempted hook-up in the case you should get rejected) and it will have implications as to what people think about you and future girls you may go after. Girls Chase is the world's most popular men's dating advice site. Over. Before that, I did date within my primary social circle, so there are some exes I still see on rare occasions. Now that I have an SO it feels kind of awkward if the get-together is a small one. If we broke up, I don't think I would have dated within a primary circle of friends again. Nov 12, The Value of Your Social Circle (Or: Embrace The Friend Zone) November 12, by Dr. NerdLove Comments Everybody's always looking for the silver bullet, the magical process that will transform you from nerd to natural instantly and bring sex swimming to your door without effort and unfortunately, it doesn't exist.
For another: being able to approach strangers and befriend them is a valuable skill to have under any circumstances. Being able to cold-approach strangers is a good way of rebuilding that social circle from scratch. And, most importantly: mastering a difficult skill makes the related skills even easier.
Dating among your social circle is great when there's a genuine relationship between you two. But when you start having to hit on them instead of just flirting naturally, you become an opportunist and people hate that shit. Oct 25, Dating At Work, School, and Friends. Some people say "don't do it." And that's a fair argument. You definitely are taking risks. A pickup attempt or a relationship that doesn't work out can create a bad situation within your social circle. This can mean as little as a bit of awkwardness or as much as complete alienation from the group. One thing that annoys me personally about social circle - may just be a personal peeve that has nothing to do with the actual efficacy of social circle vs. cold approach - is the "trade the date" mentality. e.g., yesterday, Chris was dating Suzie, Ben was .
The people who are most successful at dating - who expand their social networks and use those networks in order to be able to make a warm approach - are the people who take every opportunity they can get to network and be social. Work, meet-ups, amateur sports leagues these are all places where you have a chance to expand your social circle and potentially meet new awesome single people.
This is why. Belinda "Does the younger boyfriend know that you're not taking the relationship seriously in this situation and have people in mind that you intend to dump him for if you get the chance? NerdLove Dr. NerdLove Store Dr. Of course, there isn't anything inherently wrong with dating someone in your friend group.
Dating Within The Group (by @mikefalzone)
And while the potential of harming an already existing friendship is often the reason people use for not dating a friend, Ettin suggests not letting fear get in the way of following your heart. And let's be real, everyone is certainly going to have their opinions on any new relationship within the fold. Despite how difficult it might be to avoid spilling all of the juicy details to your other friends, if they're also friends with your new bae, then that might not be the best idea.
If you think that once you start dating a friend you'll be able to skip off into the sunset hand-in-hand with the rest of your crew happily trailing behind, then think again. PDA in the presence of your other friends could probably illicit some weird vibes, certified love coach Nikki Leigh tells Elite Daily.
As someone who has witnessed friend groups implode over relationships that didn't last, being sensitive to the fact that a new relationship could impact everyone - even though it feels like it shouldn't be their business - is key. Try to be understanding of the fact that your new romance might cause someone you care about to feel jealous or left out.
Besides, I think X, Y, or Z might get a liiiittle jealous. You've shown that you aren't hooking up with her for the kudos from the boys, which disarms one typical objection, and. You've also elevated her above the other girl you've just mentioned, which takes care of the bruised ego she might've had at suggesting that you wanted to keep her a secret.
It makes you a team and keeps the interaction in that "just you and her" bubble that you've already created with your hidden move. Alternately, if she agrees with your discretion frame immediately, then she's already on your team and you're good to go no other reassurances required.
May 27, In my view, dating within one's social circle is ideal. It provides natural vetting and solves the problem of "creepy strangers". Rejection isn't an utter fiasco if everyone is reasonably deferential and jankossencontemporary.com is far more awkwardness in being the only unmarried person in a group, than in being a recently-dumped boyfriend in a group. Mar 19, "Dating within a friend group will certainly change the dynamic of the group," dating coach Erika Ettin tells Elite Daily. "Whether that's for better or worse is really something no one can know Author: Tayi Sanusi. Start dating a girl in your social circle. Bars and clubs (and restaurants, coffee shops, etc.) are great places to meet women, but it's fact that most women date and hook up with men they are introduced to through their social circle. Know how to increase your social circle and improve your chances of dating within your social circle.
It's important because it can help disarm objections she may have about hooking up with you; namely, protecting her reputation, and the feeling she may have that she is just another number which increasingly becomes an issue when you start to become more known as a lady-killerbut it's also important because it allows you to work more girls in the social circle later on - it's not only about the interaction at hand. If you don't set a discretion frame before taking the interaction into sexual territory then don't lambaste yourself, it's not absolutely necessary What to do next?
You have to isolate her.
You should never really be kissing a girl in front of other people from your social circle or, heaven forbid, doing anything further than kissing in front of them. Again, this allows you to work other girls in the social circle more easily following the current sexual adventure because while you might spike their attraction and jealousy by going with a girl in front of them, they'll probably have more objections to you hooking up with them after.
The best way to do avoid this chaos with your circle and your girl is to invite her home or to a place where you and her will feel more comfortable getting sexual. Upon her consent to getting alone with you, verbal or nonverbal, this can be a good place to deliver your explicit discretion frame if you haven't already. Then you leave discreetly.
At the most tension-filled of times that can be round the back of the house at a party or more usually at one of your houses.
As you can probably start to see there is a certain synergy to all of this. If it's not possible to isolate her in this situation or you miss the chance to then simply invite her over in the following days. Since she already knows you in a social way she'll likely feel comfortable enough to come straight to your house.
Again, Chase has covered how to do this - see the articles on how to text girls for more on setting this up. As the more advanced guys will probably know this formula doesn't have to be followed to the letter.
If you feel that the interaction is solid enough without a hidden move or an overt sexual escalation you can simply invite her to hang out with you alone anyway. What's important here is discretion.
Why Social Circle Feels So Seductive
Again, there are factors outside of this interaction between you and her that you can use to facilitate isolation and make her really want to come home with you. We'll be getting into that more in the reputation management article.
Okay lads, so we've gone into the best way to escalate in social circle Let's have a brief re-cap:.
Use an inner frame that matches the outside reality of how you're acting e. Use a hidden move to take one of these light interactions further in a discrete manner so you can minimise rejection and the social ramifications of rejection, and help along future interactions by being all secret.
Set discretion frames to help her feel safer in getting sexual with you and to manage your reputation for future interactions. Use Chase's guides to inviting her over and getting her to bed. A parting note - I don't mean to get overly moralistic with you guys, but it helps if you believe that discretion is a good thing. Sometimes it can be hard for a girl to express herself sexually because of the truckload of societal conditioning lumped on her back.
Perhaps the biggest objection girls from social circle will have is that they don't want to be perceived as a hussy or just another number. They have their reputation within the group to think about. This objection exists more strongly in the social circle world than it does in the cold approach world because there are fewer social ramifications if a girl hooks up with a stranger, since she's able to more easily keep it secret and not have it tarnish her social reputation.
A girl who sleeps around a bit in her social circle is more often labelled a slut than a girl who may have slept with more people but outside her social groups. So treat her nicely, be discreet and don't be a meanie afterwards. Not saying you will be, but it's worth putting yourself in her shoes for just a second. Tune in next time to find out how to manage your reputation post-seduction and how to help you grow that reputation so it makes working your social circles even easier.
You read Girls Chase, so you're obviously quite clever, which means you've probably already started to notice how strongly reputation plays into my social circle know-how. This next article will really complement what you've just read and you'll begin to see the whole thing really coming together.
I'll be going over extended social circle and how to get access to yours in a future article. Skip to main content. How to Escalate with Girls in Social Circle.
So how is social circle escalation different from cold approach escalation? Like so: You will almost definitely see the girl again after you've hooked up with her, which obviously is not always the case if you're going the cold approach route Other people within the social circle will hear of your hook-up or attempted hook-up in the case you should get rejected and it will have implications as to what people think about you and future girls you may go after.
This means that your escalation has to be smooth and well-received You generally have a lot more time with escalation windowsso it's not as do or die as cold approach; that doesn't mean there aren't times to push the envelope, but it sometimes means you don't move as fast Be Flirty It's important to flirt with all of the girls in the social circle.
So what kind of things am I talking about?
A lot of nonverbal stuff like this: Lingering eye contact Playful touching Teasing The 'I know something you don't' look Occasionally you can throw in a verbal sign of interest but make sure to disqualify it immediately after. An example would look like this: Pete: Yeah, you're hot, shame you dance like Steve Urkel [wave a dismissive hand, smile and back turn.
Your Frame What are frames? Hidden Moves These are to test the water out before larger escalations. You don't want people seeing it for two reasons: It can make it harder to seduce other girls in the social circle if you are seen to be going round and doing this to lots of girls, especially in a short time period If you get rejected it'll not be as harmful for your social reputation You shouldn't really get rejected but even if you do the relatively innocuous nature of the first way I'm going to show you to do this thankfully I've found it to be the most connective one too means that it's not going to be a really strong rejection that she'll laugh about with her friends.
It's going to be dependent on where you are but here are a couple of ways to do this: Take her hand secretly - my favourite of these. Give her hand a gentle squeeze and caress Rub her leg secretly - same as above. Can be done in different situations Grab her ass secretly - and again, just try to be secret.
Dating within social circle
It's going to depend on the girl and the situation If she responds positively, which she should do as you're the boss man, then that's your invitation to take the escalation further. Discretion Frames Before I take you into how to take an interaction further from there I'd like to get into something that you can do to proactively help out an interaction before it's further down the sexual road.
How do we set it? Why is this important?