A reader recently contacted me and wanted to know how to overcome a scarcity mentality when dating. He also wanted to know how to create an abundance mindset. Chris - I purchased your ExGirlfriend program and am very impressed with the product. In order to develop an abundance mentality you have to actually start to create abundance in your life. This means that you have to start acting in an abundant way by dating more women and creating more options for yourself. The same goes for things like confidence. For example, going to the gym, doing martial arts, mastering a hobby, dating more women, improving our education or business prospects are all things that will collectively raise our confidence as a man.
That is why they are so turned off by men who put them on a pedestal for no reason. These are some great ways to start creating options in your life and greater abundance.
Of course a crucial rule applies here, that is: in order to have great abundance and options in life, you have to also be a person that embraces opportunity and be a high value man to attract more women and opportunities. I hope this helps to get you started. If you need an urgent response to fix your situation, please don't hesitate to book an email or phone consultation with me and I'll get back to you ASAP. Everything you need to know about creating, building, and maintaining attraction can be found within these pages.
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I would be open for an email consultation with you, let me know what you think. Luke In order to develop an abundance mentality you have to actually start to create abundance in your life. Abundance Creates More Abundance The great thing about abundance is that it creates more and more abundance. How To Create An Abundance Mentality To achieve true abundance in life I recommend the following steps: Get yourself into great physical shape this helps to attract more women and convert more dating prospects.
Have goals or projects in your life that you are working on. This will make women see you as a more valuable man. Start approaching and talking to more women in daily life. Forget night clubs and bar pickup. Instead focus on day to day interactions which have a higher chance of conversion. Start online dating Tinder etc. This will get you more interest off women and more options, and you will see that there are other women out there who are very interested in you, not just your current love interest.
Move to a city. I am not like disgusting Nigerian Men who feel that they must undermine women in order to feel good about themselves. I noticed that you hardly ever respond to any comment logically challenging your flawed ideas and false sense of superiority. Are you scared that you - an all powerful and all knowing Nigerian Man - will be outsmarted and embarrassed by a woman on the internet?
Are you afraid that your diminishing esteem and your insecure existence will both completely collapse at the mere idea that you cannot have your way especially when it comes to women? Go and make something out of yourself and stop relying on the suppression of women to feel good about your pathetic life.
I was ashamed when a group of African American sisters sat me down and told me their stories of woe at the hands of Nigerian men. Is there no end to your shame? Listen to what your women are telling you and change!!!!
Please what is paining you like this? It seems you have been turned down a lot by women and I can clearly see why. No woman with her ducks in a row will even give you a minute of her time. You need to understand that no gender is superior, but then again you come across as a bigoted brute so I will not waste my time. Nowhere in the article did she mention hate for men.
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On the contrary you are the one who has come here with all the bile of your sad situation of daily wet dreams about all the women you will never have, seeking a way to vent. Hey all! N stands for W. B female body part Women Organization for Men Bashing! A real Nigeria fits that bill. I have accepted this! And I am a woman! This article is on point. It still baffles me how some guys who were born and bred outside of Nigeria still have this mentality. BUT you can meet guys who were raised in Nigeria that are more open minded.
Very true! Good point. Hawt Talk With Tosan. Unfortunately it is African women who raise these entiltled African men! My mother in law recently told me a woman should serve her husband food on the table or she will be thrown out to which I answered is he handicap? She also told my daughter has to learn to cook coz she is a woman to which I said no she should learn to cook because she needs the skills to make home cooked meals and so should my son.
Women are not oppressed. Never have been. When have women ever been treated this way? Yeah oppression is men going out into war with Boko haram terrorists to serve our country,oppression is men taking tough jobs to provide for their families,oppression is men building homes for women and children. Feminism is about equality between both genders,Right? If so,then many of you feminists need to stop focusing only on women issues and focus on both genders.
TIL oppression is doing what you are supposed to do. He provides for the family so he should be worshiped. African men can never change. No matter how many years they stay abroad or whatever, they will never stop being sexist and misogynistic.
They are sick. Go and marry your oyibo man now. Other countries have women as their president and leaders.
The new U. There are very open African men who learn and grow along the way.
Jan 23, I have discovered that African men who have studied/worked or done both in the Western world like to assume an aura of "I'm exposed". So . Just like you wonder what happens when you date a CEO, people are asking what it's like to date a stripper. An once again, answers. There is no better song that could epitomize this feature than the auto-tune virtuoso, T-Pain's "I'm N Luv *Wit a Stripper*.". A reader recently contacted me and wanted to know how to overcome a scarcity mentality when dating. In this article I'll show you how to create abundance.
There are some African women who are just difficult to deal with. Choose wisely and you will be fine. Nobody could stop them from anything including African men. No part of your comment makes any sense.
Stop relying on revisionist history and the nonsense leftist propaganda that Hilary was the next big thing for women to fuel your counter-arguments. You clearly have issues. You need a psychiatrist to put you on medication. Then a psychologist for intense therapy. If African men have African mentality what do African women who gave birth to them have? African Women allowed some of the entitlement, behavior African men display. And what are African women doing to change it even just to make their own lives better in society instead of their lives being revolved around men.
Sorry to say o. My man is very nigerian living abroad. But he has developed into the lovely man bcos we live equally in d home. Picks and drops kids. Cooks for us i. Washes d plate before i return cos i hate a dirty kitchen gosh. I used to be so angry before he decided to change.
I cook his food and he walks to kitchen to pick it up and returns his plate. Abeg i dont mind him at all. Hes a great niggur. I can say we spend our money together too. Maybe dats why hes sooo good. I once dated a guy, we both studied abroad etc. Both from wealthy homes etc. But this guy could never behave. I put up with his nonsense till I no longer could. He later moved on to a white girl, and he worships the ground she walks on. You know he was bad and yet put up with him?
For the white woman - Nigerian male analyzes that these women are of a different culture and are not privy to his culture.
Also, White patriarchy even protects its women. So he cannot exercise his full blown demonry. He must treat her well. For the Nigerian woman - His reasoning is you know your culture, your mother did it and you must die doing it. Sad but oh so true. Many of these men truly believe themselves to be inferior to white people, and dating a white girl makes them feel equal. This is so true!
Your story did not reflect this article, beside any colour of many could have done that you have the responsibility to protect yourself. I can understand what you are saying. It seems that way like an African man would choose to disrespect his African lady by making such statement. We are complex and a lot has changed in the world. Like I say. Without the law women and children do suffer. We should be grateful that there is a law that protects women.
Nice piece. I have said this before, some of us guys, in the bid not to be seen as backward, we tend to act as though we are cool with certain things which we are not. If you are faking it, you will find yourself being emotionally manipulative in the relationship. And as for women, this same hypocrisy goes both ways. I once dated a Naija girl when I was back in the UK.
She shoved equality and feminism down my throat every day. Fine, I was as liberal as she wanted. We did when she wanted. And jealous of their lives. Bottom line is that, the same number of men faking evolved mindset, Naija women are also faking it. You people never tire to talk about african men Go and date an iranian, a gambian, or an american if you dont like them.
Isnt it ironical that you dont have any other thing to do with your life than write about the men and talk about them day in day out? If they write about you too, you will know you are not even fit to be married by them.
There are lots of nigerian guys who do not follow the norm a lot of Nigerian woman have been forced to accept. Ese jare. Always try to find what makes you happy. If you find one,keep it and be happy,good for you. Lots of truth here, lots of pretenders whose true colours show easily. There is an exception to every rule, the are a few who are the minute minority sadly.
Is ist by force to marry African Man with African Mentality?
Go and marry american now and save us the wahala. It is not by force to marry na, so why is it paining you? Do white boys make you feel insecure? Or are you like the person ME and Engoz described up there who only feel empowered when they are surrounded by women silenced by their cultures?
The type that feel getting laid and beating on their wives is the only way to boost their fragile egos? You dating white boys makes us feel insecure? I guess you are one of those negro bed wenches with low self esteem and inferiority complex. You worship white men and non black-black man. You swirlers are looking for white simps you can control and manipulate.
You negro bed wenches are traitors to black race and enemy within. You should be ashamed of yourself,you value and uphold white men and devalue us. Maybe the only men who are willing to tolerate this bad attitude and idiotic feminism ideology are white men simps not a real African man. Look at a Nigerian man who wets his bed and throws tantrums about feminism telling me I have low self esteem and inferiority complex.
This Mindset Shift Guarantees A Great Date (Matthew Hussey, Get The Guy)
Here you are trying so hard to play down your hatred men, trying to sound objective and rational. Pele sogbo. Life is easy. Go and marry a white man so you can be a princess like you read in all your romance novels and those Disney story books. And you sound like an insecure, bedwetting manlet who cannot stand the idea of women rejecting the Patriarchy.
The same Patriarchy that gives useless, good-for-nothing men like you the idea that they can be complete losers in life but still be placed on top of well-to-do women by the society. Keep on crying and b! Your little world where you, your fathers and sons undermine women is slowly coming to an end.
You dislike women as much as hadiza and ARN, on every page about women, you lurk. Looking for one comment you dislike to use and insult women in general. It sounds personal, you sound pained. I prefer Hadiza and ARN to you because they are at least open and grave enough to shove their misandry down our faces, but you make up facts, add words where there are none, and make the most hateful and vile comments. Get over yourself for goodness sake. Nice articlebut wait a min,where is Paul adeyemo?
John John. It will make you feel good about the cheating, wife-beating scum that you are.
Nice try, Those same women that you are trying to hypocritically advocate for will fall into the clutches of useless Nigerian men like you who will police their every move and thought. I mean, accordong to lunatics like you, what good is a 5.
A man will treat you how you want to be treated. Maybe the girl is upfront with him about her expectations for their relationship. A cheat will always cheat, regardless of who he is with. I personally know a maiguard who loves his wife above all else. PS: maybe he was upfront with you about the cheating because he thought you were cool like that. I have been very upfront with him that I am very forgiving with the exception of physical violence and infidelityand he knows I have the heart and means to walk away if either occurs.
10 Questions You Need To Ask Before You Get Into Any Serious Relationship
An African man will always be an African man. Where I think there might be a disconnect is that you automatically think that because African men are traditional, they cannot be advocated of gender equality.
For example, An idea life for my boyfriend would be to wake up to freshly prepared breakfast, lunch, and dinner, cooked by me of course. If I choose to not do the latter, he is totally fine with it.
We will work a way around it, as long as both parties are happy. Does this apply to all the men in your family, brothers, cousins, uncles, your Dad? Please refrain from generalizing. In Nigeria; to be married is more important than to be happy.
You know that. Its quite sad that the population who are going to read this articule are women. Just because it goes in one ear and goes out the other. So what population of these women who make up feminist believe they can change men? Nigerian men have done nothing wrong, but are just product of the society that we women have babied them in. There are people that will love you for exactly who you are. If you want a submissive, stay at home wife, there are lots of that type out there.
Find someone to love you as you are. The western culture and European mode of civilization is thriving and outgrowing our African cultural heritage.
Africa is becoming fully westernized now. Western culture now is regarded as front line civilization. African ways of doing things now has become primitive,archaic and regrettably unacceptable in public domain. Not only were cts of the material culture in the colonies lost or destroyed. We men are losing our power and women have lost sense of cultural continuity.
Civilization was just another concept of domination imposition of incoming new culture over our traditional cultural values. Traditional family values breaking down very rapidly. Women are trying to topple down our African patriarchal society. Your constant whining and insecurity is a source of tremendous comedy. Shaming language,ad-hominem insults and emotion tirade are pretty much all that feminism influenced women like you use when they argue,Logic?
Forget it. Your comment is typical female egocentrism,lies and deflections. Shaming language? These are just a few of the nonsense you men say when you are with each other, and you dare talk to me about shaming language and ad hominem? What kind of a hypocrite are you? You must respect me even if I am a loser!!!! As an avid reader, I find your comments funny and effective most times. Name calling aside, you speak the truth often.
You seem like a brilliant woman who has had a tough life and is revolting. Keep revolting. However, travel light dear, let go of any the part that hurts.
The Western Civilization is outgrowing your African cultural heritage because your African cultural heritage cannot compete in research and innovation. The difference between western patriarchy and your African patriarchy is it endeavors to make life better for its women and children.
For example, Western patriarchy will want women to cook but is also thinking of alleviating that burden hence it will create dishwashers, gas cookers, laundry machines, microwave, vacuum cleaners etc. Your patriarchy has been utterly retrogressive.
What has Nigerian patriarchy done other than be a big boil in the butt of women? What has it achieved? What benefits has it given to its women and children? The future of Nigeria under your patriarchy is extremely useless.
Only a foolish person with the IQ of an earthworm continues to do the same thing over and over again and expects different results. African patriarchy is demonic. And not even feminism will kill it, because it will eventually kill itself, because the dumb men who populate it cannot compete with the real alpha males. African patriarchy will DIE a natural death, and most rightly so. Sisi, One of the many problems of the black man is his failure to be truthful with himself. He gets extremely sentimental with the facts and his ego quickly shatters.
We live on controversial topics like this. You are one of those Black people with egos that are easily broken, thereby you are the one most likely to suffer from inferiority complex. You cannot argue without letting your emotions run high like you are addicted to narcotics.
Now, instead of letting your emotions run high, the onus is on you to present the indices of the Nigerian man as a technological guru in comparison to other races of men in the 21st century. Best comment ever! Bloody useless Nigerian men demanding respect yet put to shame by their peers from other continents. Producing nothing but noise all over the place! Chief chief! Your inference that women should thank men for being on this planet reeks of superiority to women!
A woman carried you for many months in her uterus and breast fed you. Women are powerful beings to be respected and honored as much as men are. The creator does not place a higher value on men than women.
Asake spoke about many types of men. She did not say ALL men are so. As much as men want loyalty, fidelity and moral support, women want and deserve the same. We pair up because we want a team mate. It should not be a master and slave situation! Men lose their minds when controlled by women, women feel the same way. Feminism is not a cult. It is simply the idea that both sexes are equal.
Women have been oppressed for many years. Someone in the thread highlighted that some mothers have contributed to their boys thinking that the sexes are not equal. That writer was being empathetic to men. There also other articles on this website that have addressed what the male child has been taught to rest his identity on and how that affects the way he conducts himself.
There is an article that talked about how men have been taught to manage their emotions in our culture etc. I found both articles to be rather empathetic towards men. My point is that men get empathy here too.
If every real man had this mentality,women will have no choice but to exist in our world,the way we want them to exist. The above statement implies that it is your world and women just live in it and they must do as you tell them to.
You want a relationship that works? Where slavery exist, resistance will surely come. History has proven this in many settings. At least not all men dumped, molested and messed her sense belonging up.
Both sexes are not faultless. Whether we use cheap phones or not doesnt devalue or discredit our cause. How insecure and sad your life must be thinking that every feminist is lonely or frustrated or miserable. If clinging on to that senseless, overused angle is what makes you happy, keep on going, twat. Keep screaming in your echo chamber till your delusion and desperation finally get the better of you.
Your comment lacks research,relevancy and almost all your comments lack structure. We live in a country where men have always been mandated to go war. You want equality? Then act like it,then start giving men their due respect and treat us like the humans we are who are not created to be disposable so you can come online and bitch out patriarchy.
And those men dying in sambisa forest to make sure that those chiboks girls are rescued. You are ungrateful misandrist with no reality based logic,You want African traditional gender roles to end.
Misandry is in fact a very pervasive problem but the public has been blind to it for a long time.
You have proven your thoroughly of factual evidence. Of course, this is really a man hating blog where you and your co disgruntled feminists spew hatred towards men.
Your double standard and hatred for the male gender is clear,not only from your hateful comments. As a real man,either you exist in my circumference as a submissive,respectable,loyal woman or my energy will repel you to get away. I have been saying this,Feminism is the cause of mass production of BETA males,we have to get rid of the evil system of feminism,so men can get out of that beta males mindset.
If you can call human being DOGs. She need help women society should help her. Oya back to the matter. Truth of the matter is both genders are guilty. However, the onus lies on you to adopt positives in other cultures and also drop negatives in yours. This has absolutely nothing to do with haven lived, worked or studied abroad. The world is a global village. At the click of a button, I can keep myself ated on activities ongoing in the opposite end of the globe. There are positives and negatives in the western culture, same as there are positives and negatives in the African culture.
A lot of Nigerians till date will never disclose their travel plans to others or will give false travel dates for fear of their planes being pulled down by enemies. In ? How more backward can we possibly get? Before I begin to digress, these so called egocentric and chauvinistic men were raised by women.
Part-blame goes to women for indoctrinating men with wrong values. Running after wealthy married men. Or Rich young guys. Do you date upcoming talent? Some girls like you are the one who meet a guy today and next week will be your birthday or you loose your phone.
Stop dating wallet and last name. Find work do. Only you comment full ground like bar beach water? You took the words right outta my mouthyou go gurrl I just have to add that some girls still go ahead and marry the sorry losers cause they start drinking the cool aid after so many years of hearing it. The ones women are ready to do anything so they can be called Mrs?
Have you looked at the comments section of weddings on BN? And these same women even educated and financially stable ones wont leave even when they have blatantly cheated? Where is the point of convergence? Get all negative n insulting as u wanna get.
Wish the men could just try to comprehend what women who are obviously tired of your nonsense are trying to communicate to you,instead of making us out to be crazy! But does A Real Nigerian know that this men that you are bashing was raised by African women? This men are raised by African Women let that sink in.
Ah, the victim mentality. Also known as a martyr complex, the world is peppered with those who play the role of the perma-victim, constantly being wronged by everything and everyone in their lives. From their jobs to their home life, these people can be toxic and emotionally draining. If someone in your life cycles through drama after drama, it. Jan 03, So let's talk about one of the most important beliefs when it comes to success in dating: adopting an abundance mentality. Scarcity Vs. Abundance. Most men I've coached have had issues with a scarcity mentality - that is, the belief that women are a limited resource. Women in the dating world tend to use the term "Player' when referring to a man that lacks the ability or desire to make a commitment. Some of these men are assumed to be purely out for sex.
As for the writer of the article, you are wrong! Have you wondered why even in USA, black men prefer to marry white women. We know wether you mess up or they mess up, the man still get thrown under the bus. Woman like you. Raised by African Women whose minds have been policed by the Patriarchy. Who are the authors and enablers of the Patriarchy?
African Men in this context. So you were saying? This is me. Everybody do you, these long arguments haff do. Just had a mental picture of chief and a real Nigerian getting married.
We find love in funny places abi? It is you that will marry Chief and subject yourself to infidelity, ignorance, incompatibility and irritating, beta, manlet behaviour. Love does happen. This post is only an opinion of one. In my opinion, I am married. Based on this, I think some men are really great and I am happier than when I was single. A man is himself, what he wants to be, his behavior is his. Pretending to be someone else is a waste of the person you are.
I very much disagree with this statement for obvious reasons. I am a feminist, because I want equality for all. And while it is easy to lash out on men who seem unsympathetic to the cause, I have to continually remind myself that feminism is not reverse discrimination against men.
There are bad men and women out there just like there are good men and women. Communication is broken down during fights and no one hears anything.
Civil discussions have the ability to teach, and allows the audience receive the message in its intended form. Note to naija men here. These are a few of the battles naija women face daily. These are a few things that have made us so angry and bitter and quick to lash out.