Everyday I listen to my combat veterans as they struggle to return to the "normal" world after having a deeply life-changing experience. I do everything I can to help them. Sometimes that can involve medications, but listening is key. Sometimes a combat veteran tells me things that they wish their families knew. They have asked me to write something for their families, from my unique position as soldier, wife, and physician. These are generalizations; not all veterans have these reactions, but they are the concerns most commonly shared with me.
They cope with things with a dark sense of humor, and this can be a little off-putting. Just like dating a civilian woman, military women will leave bobby pins behind.
Occasionally, they get left behind on night stands and kitchen sinks as an accidental territory marker. Air Force photo by Airman Collin Schmidt. Any relationship is built on trust and understanding - a relationship with a vet is no different.
Special importance has to be put on trust, though. Many veterans are used to losing the people who are closest to them, whether from failed relationships, in combat, or to suicide. They may not want to get attached for fear of losing you, but you have to work to build their trust.
Any veteran, young or old, loves to tell stories from their service. Guidons of the 3rd Squadron, 4th Cavalry Regiment, surround the newlywed couple.
Photo courtesy of Richard and Janet Page. Veterans can be intense people.
Learning new things may include backpacking or kayaking or it could be a sport like football or basketball. No matter what, you have to learn to give percent to anything you try. While visible wounds may make people stare, the invisible wounds can be harder to deal with in a relationship. Traumatic brain injuries and post-traumatic stress are big hurdles modern veterans face, and they can affect their closest relationships dramatically.
Patience is key in a time where your significant other is facing something they may not want to - or be able to - talk about. Dating a veteran can be either very difficult or quite simple, depending upon the couple's compatibility and how affected the veteran has been by his or her military experience.
Dec 10, What I've Learned From Dating a Veteran. I too am a war veteran, a combat medic to be exact. but overall great post, non liberal, . Here are my TOP 5 TIPS FOR A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP WITH A COMBAT VETERAN: 1. Make SELF-LOVE a Priority This is for BOTH of you. If you're in a relationship with someone who has been in a high-stress envoirment for over a decade, it . Dating a veteran can be either very difficult or quite simple, depending upon the couple's compatibility and how affected the veteran has been by his or her military experience. Veterans with post-traumatic stress disorder face additional challenges in relationships. If the couple is well-suited to each other.
Veterans with post-traumatic stress disorder face additional challenges in relationships. If the couple is well-suited to each other, understanding and communication can overcome most of the possible difficulty of dating a veteran. Talk about his service and his status as a veteran.
10 Types of Soldiers in the Army
This isn't a first-date conversation, but you should discuss your date's time in the military before the relationship becomes serious. Be aware that not all veterans will want to open up about their experiences right away.
Ask if there is anything you can do to be more considerate of your date's needs in light of her past service.
Don't pressure her, but do give her an opportunity to share her feelings with you and enlist you as an ally in dealing with the challenges of life as a veteran. Understand the importance of his relationships with his military friends. Many veterans stay friends with the people they served with for the rest of their lives.
Dating a combat veteran is hard. "Hard" is an adjective that means "requiring a great deal of effort," in case you were wondering. Which makes me rethink the adjective I just used to describe what dating a combat vet is like. A better word may be demanding. At any rate, being in a romantic relationship with someone who has contributed. Jun 16, Dating anyone can be an exciting roller coaster ride. If you are dating a combat veteran however, the experiences can be a whole lot different than with anyone else. Here are some things you might want to know about before or while you are dating a combat veteran. Many veterans (and friends of veterans) love [ ]. Jun 22, I learned firsthand that dating a veteran is anything but one-dimensional when I fell in love with an Iraq War vet. We think about combat, weapons, trenches - Author: Elite Daily Staff.
If he drops everything to help a military buddy in need, don't take it personally; understand that these are friends who were once expected to be willing to die for one another. Treat your date as you would treat any other person you care about, regardless of any physical or mental impairments sustained due to her service.
If your date has a disability, assume that she understands her own needs better than you do. Allow her to tell you how she'd like to be treated, rather than offering unwanted help that may seem patronizing.
Honor his commitment to his country by getting involved in veterans' organizations and volunteer work together.